By Jennifer Lee
I had to Google what respect actually means.
Yep, true story.
Why?
Because lately, I’ve been sitting with this deep, painful trigger that seems to light up every time someone makes fun of me for just being… well, me.
Even though I know that technically no one can make me feel hurt or pain—my body still feels it. My chest still tightens. My eyes still well up. And I keep coming back to one word: disrespect.
So what is respect, really?
According to the internet:
“Respect means accepting someone for who they are, even when they’re different from you or when you don’t agree with them.”
It builds trust. Safety. Emotional well-being.
It’s not something we’re all born with—it’s something we learn.
Now here’s the kicker…
I’ve always been the kind of person who accepts people exactly as they are. No matter what they believe, how they behave, or how they treat me—respect has always been a given. I show up with love, with compassion, with acceptance. That’s who I am.
But lately, I’ve come to realise something incredibly painful…
I haven’t received the same level of respect in return.
And wow, that hurts.
All I’ve ever wanted is to feel accepted. For my heart. My beliefs. My way of thinking. The fact that I love deeply and speak openly. The way I move through life with softness and strength.
Yet time and time again, I find myself wondering:
“What have I done that makes people not accept me for me?”
“Why am I mocked for my thoughts, the way I talk, the way I feel?”
Why is it so hard to feel accepted just for being different—for not fitting someone else’s version of “normal”?
I’ve spent years shape-shifting, trying to become the version of me that would be loved, respected, and welcomed in. I’ve played roles. I’ve worn masks. I’ve been the “good girl,” the “cool girl,” the “chill girl.”
And guess what?
None of it worked.
Those people still left.
And I was still miserable.
Then, when I finally started to drop the masks and just be me, the people around me—some of them—began making fun of that, too.
It’s heartbreaking to feel like no matter how much you give, love, and accept others… you’re still not enough.
But here’s what I’m learning…
✨ This isn’t a “me” problem. It’s a “wound” I’m being called to heal. ✨
I began this personal development journey because, deep down, I believed there was something wrong with me.
Now I know—I was never broken.
I was just programmed.
Conditioned to believe I had to become something or someone else in order to be loved.
When really, the work is about un-becoming all the versions of myself I created for others…
…and finally returning home to who I truly am.
So if you’re reading this and you’ve ever felt the same—let me say this to you, from the deepest part of me:
You are worthy of love, acceptance and respect—as you are.
You do not have to mould, shrink, or change to fit someone else’s comfort zone.
The ones who are meant for you will never mock your magic.
And if you’re tired of the old stories, the pain, and the patterns that keep looping—please know you’re not alone.
This is the exact kind of inner work I help others with inside my signature free resource:
🌟 “3 Effective Steps to Managing Triggers”
You can download it:
Because respect begins within.
And healing is always an inside job.
With love,
Jennifer 💛
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